November 12 2002

Simon Jordan

Criticised in the past for being too pro-Jordan, Jamesey writes an open letter to our chairman...

Dear Simon Jordan

I am certain there is nothing anyone could teach you about building up a successful retail business, but you still have much to learn about the football industry, if you are prepared to listen.

And although it's still early days, your loyalty to Trevor Francis when all around were calling for his head, is admirable.

The way our team has been playing recently (Brighton, Walsall, Coventry and Forest) is gritty and determined and full of the sort of self belief that was so lacking before.

We will almost certainly never meet, Simon. You are a high-profile entrepreneur and I am a retired journalist. You would probably find the fact that I write a column for a website as a labour of love quite absurd.

You are a chauffeur-driven limo, chairman's dining room, champagne and caviare person. I am a Victoria-Selhurst stopping train, curry sauce and chips, al fresco at the Whitehorse Road Chinese chippie individual.

Nevertheless we share a common passion - Crystal Palace Football Club. But, in my case, that passion does not extend to buying lots of replica shirts, CPFC wallpaper or anything else of that nature.

I have a collection of scarves from various eras and even they were bought from blokes with stalls outside the ground.

I am a concessionary season ticket owner, so over the season I only pay £8 for a £25 seat. It's obvious really, Simon, that you won't get any richer through me.

You talk up the virtues of free enterprise in your programme notes and lecture us for not using the ground bars and food outlets.

Well, Simon I will exercise my spirit of free enterprise by eating and drinking in pubs and cafes outside the ground, rather than queue up in the undermanned and overpriced Selhurst Park venues.

You also sent me a letter saying I was using the "wrong" credit card and would I immediately change to a Crystal Palace alternative? Well, no I won't, because I'll use the card I feel like using.

The ultimate in commercial inanity came during the Forest game (November 9). During a thrilling, no-quarter-given match of great importance between old rivals (but not, I think, enemies), the 19,000 supporters of both clubs were treated to commercial offers of a free football for anyone spending more than a certain amount in the club shop.

Now, there is a time and a place for everything but when the gladiators are fighting a battle of blood and guts on the pitch, we do not need trite commercials blasted out on the sound system.

And while I am writing, has the match programme editor been instructed not to sub-edit your notes? The quote below from the Forest programme would be a prime contender for the Gibberish Award of the Millennium.

"Unfortunately in football as I have come to realise it is a game of agenda's [sic] and self reward/gratfication, Adam [Crozier] in his desire to fulfil his mandate went toe to toe with the Premiership per se' [sic], he, in my opinion was neither wrong or right as a governing body you exist because of the game itself but as importantly the clubs and you have a reponsibility to look after the clubs, but on the converse while I agree with meritocracy and survival of the fittest, the greed and avarice of the Premiership at the cost of everything and everyone else in football is reaching legendary levels."

Get real and get edited, Simon! And please remember that a football club has a soul. A mobile phone business doesn't.

Sincerely wishing you all the good fortune in the world.

Jamesey

Email Jamesey with any of your comments to Jevans3704@aol.com