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I say,I say ,I say.....crap joke thread! (LOCKED)
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 rednblueblood 24 Jun 13 7.02am |
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My next door neighbour knocked on my door wearing just a see through negligee, asked to borrow a cup of sugar and then asked to come in for a cup of coffee. I said "f*** off Dave, I've got to go to work."
In dog beers I’ve only had one. |
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Cannonball  High in the Ozarks. 26 Jun 13 2.15pm |
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Touch my coffee and I will slap you so hard even Google won't be able to find you. |
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eagle52  Shirley,Croydon 30 Jun 13 11.17am |
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I met a girl at a party last night-I said "You remind me of my little toe!"-She said, "Small and petite?" "No" I said,"I'll probably bang you later on the table when I'm p*ssed."
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| Cannonball High in the Ozarks. 01 Jul 13 2.42pm |
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I had a big lead in a trivia competition at a local bar until the last
Touch my coffee and I will slap you so hard even Google won't be able to find you. |
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| eagle52 Shirley,Croydon 07 Jul 13 8.54am |
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Marvin Gaye once asked me how I managed to get my cattle from a field from one side of the vineyard to the other.
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| madmel73 Croydon 09 Jul 13 4.03pm |
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A Belgian Kiss is like a French Kiss...but with more phlegm!!
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| rednblueblood 10 Jul 13 9.36pm |
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An Australian kiss is like a French kiss but its down under (¡)
In dog beers I’ve only had one. |
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| doi209 Fighting for the weak and innocent... 16 Jul 13 8.46pm |
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A man went to get the results of his illness from the doctor.. "I'm afraid you have Yellow 42 - a disease so rare it doesn't have a proper name. Bad news is..you only have six months to live..." The man goes home and tells his wife. After the crying, she vows to spend more time together for the final few months together - starting tonight at the bingo hall. So the go down to Gala Bingo. In the entrance hall he puts a pound in the slot machine..and wins £200. He plays bingo and wins every line, corner and full house. He plays the national link and wins £20000. Upon receiving the money the MC says "you must be the luckiest man alive. You win £200, all the bingo and £20k national." The man says "I have Yellow 42" "Bugger me" says the MC, "you've won the raffle as well".
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saveloy  carmarthen 19 Jul 13 12.45pm |
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Quote Johnny Eagles at 18 Jul 2013 4.01pm
What's pink, 12 inches long and will make a woman moan all night long? Cot death. Hope this never happens to you prick.
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palace777  belfast 19 Jul 13 12.50pm |
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Quote Johnny Eagles at 18 Jul 2013 4.01pm
What's pink, 12 inches long and will make a woman moan all night long? Cot death.
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| doi209 Fighting for the weak and innocent... 19 Jul 13 11.37pm |
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| rednblueblood 20 Jul 13 6.01pm |
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A family are driving behind a dust bin lorry when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windscreen.
In dog beers I’ve only had one. |
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