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I say,I say,I say......crap joke thread #2
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 eritheagle  Erith 08 Oct 23 7.02pm |
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I was taken to hospital with a life threatening injury. They put me in a room with straw on the floor and a couple of horses. Now I'm in a stable condition!
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| mezzer Main Stand, Block F, Row 20 seat 1... 18 Dec 23 8.31am |
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If you suffer with insomnia, look on the bright side. Only one sleep till Christmas.
Living down here does have some advantages. At least you can see them cry. |
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| BudgiesBeak London 25 Apr 24 10.02am |
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A word of advice - don't use Tesco Dating if you're looking for a partner. A mate of mine did, and he ended up with a Bag For Life.
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| HeathMan Purley 26 Apr 24 9.57pm |
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Thank you. One from me. A new wife returns from Honeymoon and telephones her Mum in tears. "Mummy, he has started using horrible four letter words." Mum replies I know one he is able to use now that you are married. Daughter replies "That word is enjoyable, but these words he has never used before are horrible." Mum asks he to tell her the words, but daughter says they are so bade that she cannot bear to say them. Mum goes onto Plan B, after two weeks and daughter posts a sealed envelope though her parents' door. Mum opens the envelope and sees the words that her daughter has written on a sheet of paper. They are cook, wash, iron and dust.
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Teddy Eagle  26 Apr 24 10.11pm |
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mr. apollo  Somewhere in Switzerland 27 Apr 24 10.42am |
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I bought an antiperspirant the other day, it said remove cap and push up bottom, I can hardly walk but my farts smell nice.
Glad All Over |
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Zimeagle  Harare 30 Apr 24 3.55pm |
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An old lady walks into a chemist. "Do you have a deodorant?" "Certainly madam, would that be the ball type?" "No, I want it for under my arms".
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| Paaalaaace Croydon 30 Apr 24 5.13pm |
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Loved this not the nine o'clock news sketch [Link] Originally posted by Zimeagle
An old lady walks into a chemist. "Do you have a deodorant?" "Certainly madam, would that be the ball type?" "No, I want it for under my arms". Edited by Paaalaaace (30 Apr 2024 5.15pm)
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| BudgiesBeak London 23 May 24 6.54pm |
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"I wish I'd listened to the advice my father gave me when I was young."
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| Badger11 Beckenham 07 Jun 24 1.28pm |
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So it's bad enough that some men have erectile dysfunction but apparently taking Viagra means you won't forget it. Well at least you want walk around with a stonker and wonder why have I got this?
One more point |
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| ex hibitionist Hastings 08 Jun 24 4.35pm |
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Dennis Skinner just asked why Nigel Farage was celebrating D-Day ... his side lost.
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| Badger11 Beckenham 09 Jun 24 9.20am |
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This made me laugh.
One more point |
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