Is that a set of instructions for me that was just missing a comma or have I actually p*ssed you off?

ok put it this way.. I was in bed with your former chairman the last time the club went down.. and Iain Dowie was manager.. playing Everton the next day.. chairman rings Dowie.. no clue what to do.. none.. unsurprisingly Palace lost four nil.

You all think you're cleverer than me.. you're not mad.. you know your football.. you know what you would do to sort the club out.. but you're all blagging it.. just like the managers.

Did Dowie say to anyone at the pre-match presser.. "I don't know what to do, but when the chairman rings me the day before, I'll ask him if he's got any ideas?".. unlikely.

Of course Dowie didn't know I was in the chairman's bed.. so he was free to admit he didn't have a clue..

You all think I don't have a clue.. but I've been in rooms you haven't.. however many games you've been to.. you've never been in the chairman's bed during a relegation battle.

You lose if you can't hack it.. end of.

All the intricate details you're banging out.. should have played Speroni, brought someone on earlier, binned Pardew before now, this, that and the other, it doesn't matter. You're just reacting to the manager's visual effects.

When a fight is staring you in the face, you front up to it or you bottle.. and considering everyone at Palace is falling apart.. from the chairman begging everyone to see what the consortium's done so far, to the manager hoping for salvation after England and the Holmesdale crying about the stupid lightshow.. the whole lot of you are whining instead of fighting.

You can call me mad.

Great.

I am.

But you're all too sane to start a fight.

Check your PMs & give me a call. I can accommodate in NYC!!