What's wrong with the tried and tested classic?

"We were s***e".

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The Ferret
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What excuse will there be following the away fixture at Hull??
They recently beat an in form Southampton and with that great result against Newcastle last night after extra time, are showing both form, resilience and determination,which we sadly lack under Pardew.
This is truly a six pointer must win game against another relegation favourite.If we lose this one,following games against Man U and Chelsea,could very well see us propping up the Premiership,while we wait for Pardew to go on one of his exaggerated mini winning runs to counter his 9/10 losses in a row,by that time,

Each and everyone's fault other than 'Super Al'.
The wrong referee,the opposition playing their socks off, our bad injuries,although the loss of Soare and Wickham are a body blow.
Seriously, seems with the benefit of hindsight, we should never have sold Jedi, our natural leader,until an equal or better replacement was found as defensively, we are now shambolic.

Southampton had the temerity to turn up with no intention of entertaining our fans like what I do . Their priority was obviously to keep a clean sheet .
So when we did our bit to contribute to the fans enjoyment by conceding 4 it was disappointing that they did nothing to reciprocate and did not let us score .
I can only apologize to the Palace fans and assure them that we will not play such dull and cynical teams as Southampton every week

'It hurts' - does he mean the sack?
'It was just another of those moments'
'There were changes, but they need time to adapt to the changes'
'We will work on this during the coming week on the training pitch'
'I agree that we have work to do- it's so unlike us to concede from set plays'
We have the window coming up and there will undoubtedly be quality players available' - does he mean the window that Parish will throw him out of?

"I'm very disappointed with the way we defended, it was a period of absolute madness. I won't name individuals, but certain players completely ignored my instruction to stay at silly mid-off and to bowl a series of spinners during the next over. That said, the umpire let us down badly as Southampton didn't seem to have any grasp at all on the rules of Cricket and kept on kicking that over-sized and non-regulation ball into those cricket nets at the end of the pitch and not one of them was wearing a cricket box, I know as I asked Keith to check when we stopped for tea. You can't account for umpires that ignore the rules of the game and don't penalize the opposition for it".

The trouble with computers, of course, is that they're very sophisticated idiots