I was discussing at length how the club could get some value out of CB over a few pints before kick off on Saturday. In the absence of a wealthy Chinese club owner who has been in a coma for 3 years and just woken up we came up with the following:

1)Get him to sell half time super draw tickets, as this requires little or no movement.
2)Perhaps he could step in for Pete the Eagle as he has the physic to cope with the costume , and he generally wanders around the pitch aimlessly flapping his arms.
After that we were struggling.

It’s sad when our most expensive striker ever is the most popular object of our humour. You do need a sense of humour to support Palace though.

He owes us and his performances haven't been great but I thought that this was an interesting stats

"Yeah, I know that," he says with a chuckle. According to stats from the Premier League, only Cardiff (562) and Watford (570) attempted fewer crosses than Palace (577) last season. The season he finished as the club's top scorer (2016/17) they crossed the ball 872 times - only Southampton recorded more (947).

Not an excuse by any means but if you are not getting the right balls into the box it doesn't matter what target man you have there goals are going to be difficult to come by.

maybe a top Turkish club will come in for him. They always seem to pay over-the-odds for past-it Prem players.

He owes us and his performances haven't been great but I thought that this was an interesting stats

"Yeah, I know that," he says with a chuckle. According to stats from the Premier League, only Cardiff (562) and Watford (570) attempted fewer crosses than Palace (577) last season. The season he finished as the club's top scorer (2016/17) they crossed the ball 872 times - only Southampton recorded more (947).

Not an excuse by any means but if you are not getting the right balls into the box it doesn't matter what target man you have there goals are going to be difficult to come by.