This page is no longer updated, and is the old forum. For new topics visit the New HOL forum.
Register | Edit Profile | Subscriptions | Forum Rules | Log In
Pikester Worthing 10 Oct 17 2.50pm | |
---|---|
Originally posted by Mapletree
And from this I take that a loving family does not have to mean lots of attention from your natural parents. Well we'll have to agree to disagree because that statement is the very opposite of what I believe. My wife is a childminder and sometimes a parent will turn up and want to talk about their day and what they've done and what Maureen in Accounts did. All the while their child is leaping up trying to get their attention - and this is the sort of child who will misbehave the most - because all they want is that 1-2-1 time with their mum. It's really sad and I see the difference between the children whose parents run straight to them and hug them and ask them about their day as opposed to the ones who are all "me, me, me" and then straight home to go on Facebook to tell everyone else what a hard day they've had. I see a lot through my lens thank you very much Mapletree. It's always easy to assume that you're the only deep thinker in the world and the only one who gets the jokes in movies, who understands the sub plot in the novels, who is 'down with the kids' - the truth is 90% of the posters on here can be pretty deep and meaningful if really pushed and just because you're chummy with someone in Borneo doesn't make your lens gold plated.
You fed me, you bred me, I'll remember your name. |
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
jamiemartin721 Reading 10 Oct 17 2.51pm | |
---|---|
Originally posted by hedgehog50
Giving your kids to your cousins because you have too many is to be encouraged is it? Oh, Brave New World; Oh, Jeremy Corbyn. I don't really see a problem with this. Granted, I'd suggest birth control, but it was pretty common place. My parents raised my cousin, admittedly more because his dad (and I use the term lightly) couldn't seem to work out that if he didn't want kids, he should use contraception (His brother was the same, I was going to take in his youngest of six at one point). There isn't really too much of an excuse in the western world for having more kids than you want. Edited by jamiemartin721 (10 Oct 2017 2.52pm)
"One Nation Under God, has turned into One Nation Under the Influence of One Drug" |
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
Hrolf The Ganger 10 Oct 17 2.52pm | |
---|---|
Originally posted by jamiemartin721
Its interesting that we're so 'morally obliged' to comment and take offence when its gay parents, and the possible risks that may have, compared to the limitations and damage imposes by say poverty and social-economic inequality on child development in the UK (where the impacts are known, researched, documented and largely ignored). I understand that comment but I think the difference is that socio-economic circumstances are usually unavoidable whereas allowing same sex couples to adopt is a conscious decision. I am skeptical about the level of research that can be done scientifically on the long term effects. Edited by Hrolf The Ganger (10 Oct 2017 2.53pm)
|
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
Hrolf The Ganger 10 Oct 17 2.55pm | |
---|---|
Originally posted by jamiemartin721
I don't really see a problem with this. Granted, I'd suggest birth control, but it was pretty common place. My parents raised my cousin, admittedly more because his dad (and I use the term lightly) couldn't seem to work out that if he didn't want kids, he should use contraception (His brother was the same, I was going to take in his youngest of six at one point). There isn't really too much of an excuse in the western world for having more kids than you want. Edited by jamiemartin721 (10 Oct 2017 2.52pm) Until the kid finds out his parents gave him away. How would you feel?
|
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
Mapletree Croydon 10 Oct 17 2.56pm | |
---|---|
Originally posted by dannyh
That's the problem with people like you, just because someone has a different view point to you, they are being prejudiced. I have given reasoned debate (largely ignored by you and NG) on why I think we have been to quick to accept the same sex argument, in that not enough is known about the long term psychological effects, I have also stated that in the event of no nurturing "normal" environment being available, that same sex parenting is a viable solution, but way more support from social services involving a constructive critique of how to balance the child's development needs to be happening. But because we are to scared (I'm not by the way) to dismantle any ones "entitled" attitude we won't insist on it, and yet foster parents have to be trained up the ying yang, but any old tom and phil, or lisa and tara can apply to have a new borne ?
This note was not aimed at you but at Hedgehog who I consider to be very stuck in his ways. I actually don't know whether or not same sex parenting has bad side effects. Or whether on average single sex parents get a worse 'outcome', whatever that is and however it is judged, compared to mixed sex couples. I certainly see the difference between myself and my wife in our parenting roles and the way they are additive to one another. I just don't want to pre-judge. Different approaches have worked for different societies historically. What about matrilineal societies where it is the brother and not the father that is key to the child? I would suggest that same sex couples probably at least try harder to bring up their children in a thoughtful way than a huge proportion of mixed sex couples. A lot of people take parenting for granted and we have seen many really bad examples, yet the people concerned saw it as their right to be bad parents because it was 'their child'. I really don't think it's quite as easy for same sex couples to adopt as you indicate, I could be wrong.
|
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
hedgehog50 Croydon 10 Oct 17 3.00pm | |
---|---|
Originally posted by Mapletree
An English bloke called Brooke stamped out cannibalism during the 19th century. It made a brief come-back when the Japanese occupied Borneo during WW2. Nobody is saying the Brits encouraged that but... You see, your attitudes are based on very old and parochial information that have formed the basis of your prejudices. You need to get down with the young people like me. You are only 100 years wrong. Here is a 1999 article from that right wing rag, The Independent, when more than 200 people, including young babies, had been decapitated and cannibalised in Borneo. Edited by hedgehog50 (10 Oct 2017 3.05pm)
We have now sunk to a depth at which the restatement of the obvious is the first duty of intelligent men. [Orwell] |
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
Hrolf The Ganger 10 Oct 17 3.04pm | |
---|---|
Originally posted by hedgehog50
You are only 100 years wrong. Here is a 1999 article from that right wing rag, The Independent, when more than 200 people, including young babies, had been decapitated and cannibalised in Borneo. Edited by hedgehog50 (10 Oct 2017 3.00pm) His accuracy on this appears to be the same as on Irish migration.
|
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
hedgehog50 Croydon 10 Oct 17 3.06pm | |
---|---|
Originally posted by Hrolf The Ganger
His accuracy on this appears to be the same as on Irish migration. Yes, facts and figures don't seem to be his strong points. [I forgot the link - have put it in now]
We have now sunk to a depth at which the restatement of the obvious is the first duty of intelligent men. [Orwell] |
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
hedgehog50 Croydon 10 Oct 17 3.14pm | |
---|---|
Originally posted by Mapletree
This note was not aimed at you but at Hedgehog who I consider to be very stuck in his ways. Really? I consider it trying to exercise morality.
We have now sunk to a depth at which the restatement of the obvious is the first duty of intelligent men. [Orwell] |
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
Mapletree Croydon 10 Oct 17 3.16pm | |
---|---|
Y Originally posted by hedgehog50
You are only 100 years wrong. Here is a 1999 article from that right wing rag, The Independent, when more than 200 people, including young babies, had been decapitated and cannibalised in Borneo. Edited by hedgehog50 (10 Oct 2017 3.05pm) Yes, I nearly quoted the Indonesian situation but didn't want to get into too much detail. My friends left the deep jungle at the time of the confrontation in the early 1960s. It left deep-rooted hatred, everyone was very scared. Headhunting as a way of life was slowly eradicated by Rajah Brooke and his nephew. I observed very few skulls on the longhouses I visited, most people had started to throw them into the river as out of date. Every now and then they seem to remember that it's something they could do but in truth nowadays it's out of hatred and not to gain spiritual power. Mostly they have forgotten how to do the blessing of the skulls ceremony. By the way the paper quotes 'Dayaks'. This is not a term that my friends would recognise, there is a plethora of tribes. There are still some deep jungle tribesmen about whom very little is known. But how this has anything at all to do with what I was saying about parenting is quite beyond me. Edited by Mapletree (10 Oct 2017 3.24pm)
|
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
dannyh wherever I lay my hat....... 10 Oct 17 3.18pm | |
---|---|
Originally posted by Mapletree
This note was not aimed at you but at Hedgehog who I consider to be very stuck in his ways. I actually don't know whether or not same sex parenting has bad side effects. Or whether on average single sex parents get a worse 'outcome', whatever that is and however it is judged, compared to mixed sex couples. I certainly see the difference between myself and my wife in our parenting roles and the way they are additive to one another. I just don't want to pre-judge. Different approaches have worked for different societies historically. What about matrilineal societies where it is the brother and not the father that is key to the child? I would suggest that same sex couples probably at least try harder to bring up their children in a thoughtful way than a huge proportion of mixed sex couples. A lot of people take parenting for granted and we have seen many really bad examples, yet the people concerned saw it as their right to be bad parents because it was 'their child'. I really don't think it's quite as easy for same sex couples to adopt as you indicate, I could be wrong. Firstly what the in the name of Homer Simpson has they way property is handed down through the female family, or your family lineage being trcaed through your mother side got to do with same sex parents ???? are you smoking some Brixton Old Holburn? Secondly this thread is here because a gay man battered fcuk out of his baby, so I think we can ignore that little statement. As for being more thoughtful please explain to me how a gay man can show empathy with his teenage daughter for her period pain, having never experienced it ? Similarly how could a mother show empathy for a young lad whose voice is breaking, or worse has a cold I just don't think mother nature makes many design floors, and if she does, they don't tend to be around long.
"It's not the bullet that's got my name on it that concerns me; it's all them other ones flyin' around marked 'To Whom It May Concern.'" |
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
dannyh wherever I lay my hat....... 10 Oct 17 3.21pm | |
---|---|
Originally posted by Mapletree
Y Yes, I nearly quoted the Indonesian situation but didn't want to get into too much detail. Headhunting as a way of life was slowly eradicated by Rajah Brooke and his nephew. I observed very few skulls on the longhouses I visited, most people had started to throw them into the river as out of date. Every now and then they seem to remember that it's something they could do but in truth nowadays it's out of hatred and not to gain spiritual power. Mostly they have forgotten how to do the blessing of the skulls ceremony. Pfffftttttt hahahahahahahahaha sorry that f***in cracked me up. Scuse me chief can we say grace before we eat their brains out there nose. FFS, you are commedy gold lad
"It's not the bullet that's got my name on it that concerns me; it's all them other ones flyin' around marked 'To Whom It May Concern.'" |
|
Alert a moderator to this post |
Registration is now on our new message board
To login with your existing username you will need to convert your account over to the new message board.
All images and text on this site are copyright © 1999-2024 The Holmesdale Online, unless otherwise stated.
Web Design by Guntrisoft Ltd.