Many of you have been to festivals (myself included), where the toilets become unusable for 'sit-down' activities after the first day.

I've just gone 3 and a half days (84 hours) without managing number 2, because of a medical condition. Assisted by the fact I wasn't eating.
It was such a relief at 8pm yesterday. In fact I managed 2 in 10 minutes.

Good to have things back to normal. I was given an enema in hospital when I was 16 for going 2 and a half days without a pooh. You really don't want to have one of those administered by two female nurses, as the humiliation is extreme.

I disengage, I turn the page.

I was given a powder by the doctor to help me, mix with water, drink it and stay within 5 metres of a toilet. Within the hour my arse exploded, emptied the entire contents of my intestines, think it must have been liquid TNT.

Norris McWhirter confirmed this isn't a record. The current record is held by John F Kennedy, who, during the Cuban Missile Crisis, held it in for over a week.

Red and Blue Army!

I can imagine the material wedged behind your sphincter must have been hard as a rock, and something akin to removing a cork from a bottle. Or something you'd probably have to dig out to get the flow going.

I disengage, I turn the page.

As a young man I just didn't give a sh1t.

So about ten years.

Edited by Stirlingsays (11 Sep 2020 10.35pm)

'Who are you and how did you get in here? I'm a locksmith. And, I'm a locksmith.' (Leslie Nielsen)

I just read the 'about 20 years' part at first glance. That would be a serious 'backlog'.