Worst injury I’ve sustained in 29 years of walking the earth was in my early years. I was knocking conkers down with my close friends at the time and stood too close to a boy, Jamie, who decided to put everything behind his swing with a metal pole in his hand.

Unfortunately for me, the pole, snapped off at one end and razor sharp, decided to travel from my lower cheek to the top of my forehead, taking everything with it in between.

Thankfully I was glued up and young enough that there is no visible scarring. Narrowly missed my eye so I’m thankful for that!

Funny what you risk for the biggest conker!

Thanks for the kind words. Yes all good “touching wood”

You bunch of cry babies with ya serious, life threatening, mentally crushing unimaginable injuries have got f*** all on me!
I once caught my foreskin in my zipper: like, all the way up and over. Only way to release was a sharp tug (ironically, the very reason I was in such a pickle) downwards.

Beat that!

Alright everyone. Since there's no footy for a while, Here's a wierd one for all of you, and me, who've suffered grim injuries in the past. I hope this post helps someone out.

My story.
2000 whilst living in a eastern country, due to a hot lady (lady used advisorily) I was hit by a car, in the snow, in the dark, on a pushbike. This silly thing smashed my shoulder up so bad that for the last 19 years my arm never worked or felt "right". All muscle mass faded away and although my hand was always still fine, I could never drop my shoulder to a resting position. Like it felt it would fall-out of it's socket (which it did originally).

Strangely, this month, after about two weeks of strange pains and tickly, itching, aches, especially around my upper forearm and elbow, somehow, my entire shoulder, all the tendons, my shoulder blade, whatever your chest muscle tendon is called, have reactivated (and I'm not talking about the Atari Teenage Riot version).

My bloody arm works again. My bicep is suddenly long, slim and hard as f***.

So ladies n gents, it actually looks like our bods can heal themselves.

Have a decent summer and hope you have some good luck along the way.