Would you rather have Sam Allardyce as manager but he has a long elephants nose that sometimes trips the players up, or Jose mourinho but every time he sneezes the snot blinds one player for 2 minutes?

Beans beans there good for your heart, the more you eat the more you fart, the more you fart the more you eat the more you sit on the toilet seat

Give me a couple of drags on that before you stub it out.

I'd prefer Rafa Benitez with a rotating onion which distracted the opposition defenders

I'd rather install a rainbow over the Selhurst pitch and revel in it's technicolour glory. Any manager could look good so long as they are not Dutch.

Denial is not just a river in Egypt

I would rather the snot in the eye, because most of our players play like that any way

Beans beans there good for your heart, the more you eat the more you fart, the more you fart the more you eat the more you sit on the toilet seat