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man 1'My dog has no nose'
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Two dyslexic blokes walking down the street one says to the other can you smell fish? leave it out, says the other one I have a bloody job smelling my own name
Soar with the eagles or scratch with the chickens |
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The post mortem has shown that John Travolta's son died from a rare disease known as Saturday Night Fever. Sufferers have little chance of Staying Alive.
Living down here does have some advantages. At least you can see them cry. |
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Knock knock who's there? Biggish! Biggish who? NO THANK YOU !
In dog beers I’ve only had one. |
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I had a dream last night where someone shouted at me, "Ready. Set. GO!!!" And I woke up with a start.
...we must expand...get more pupils...so that the knowledge will spread... |
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A farmer goes out to his field one morning only to find all of his Cows frozen solid. "That was Thora Hird."
...we must expand...get more pupils...so that the knowledge will spread... |
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Dubai Television was refused permission to broadcast 'The Flintstones', by the owners Hannah-Barbera (a unit of MGM). A spokesman for the channel said 'A claim was made that people in Dubai would not understand the humour, but we know that people in Abu Dhabi Do"
...we must expand...get more pupils...so that the knowledge will spread... |
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My wife sat down on the
When you're dead you don't know you're dead. It is difficult only for the others. It's the same when you're stupid. |
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I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. "Somewhere I haven't been
When you're dead you don't know you're dead. It is difficult only for the others. It's the same when you're stupid. |
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With all the sadness and trauma going on in the world at the moment, it is worth reflecting on the death of a very important person, which almost went unnoticed last week. Larry LaPrise, the man that wrote 'The Hokie Cokey' died peacefully at the age of 93. The most traumatic part for his family was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in.... And then the trouble started.
Yes, I am an agent of Satan but my duties are largely ceremonial |
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What's the difference between your dream lady and your cleaning lady? Your dream lady cleans for free.
...we must expand...get more pupils...so that the knowledge will spread... |
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a boy standing in his back garden says to his mum
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