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Things that annoy you
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 kingdowieonthewall  Sussex, ex-Cronx. 03 Sep 16 8.41pm |
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Originally posted by pompeyeagle
People who walk down the road staring at their mobile phone because they can't go 5 minutes without looking at it. And when the buggers bump into you and get arsey about it.
Kids,tired of being bothered by your pesky parents? |
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| kingdowieonthewall Sussex, ex-Cronx. 03 Sep 16 8.46pm |
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Originally posted by matt_himself
Waking up with a boner when you need a piss. This is actually a good thing when you're in your late 50's , matt.
Kids,tired of being bothered by your pesky parents? |
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| SurreyEagle16 Next Door 03 Sep 16 8.54pm |
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Football fans who think that length of time as a supporter equates to validity of opinions.
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| Part Time James 03 Sep 16 9.30pm |
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Originally posted by matt_himself
I quite like the challenge of having a piss when erect. It's something only a bone fide chap can master. It's what being a man is about. Do you go for a superman or a proposal stance? I go for the latter and hook the old chap over the edge of the bowl. Another option is clenching your fist really hard. Can make a boner go away.
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| matt_himself Matataland 03 Sep 16 9.52pm |
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Originally posted by Part Time James
Do you go for a superman or a proposal stance? I go for the latter and hook the old chap over the edge of the bowl. Another option is clenching your fist really hard. Can make a boner go away. The method I use is something I have labelled the 'Red Adair'. You start with a stronger stream, bent forwards and aiming the old chap towards the porcelain. As the strength of the flow diminishes and the old chap becomes more flaccid, then a standing situation can be assumed, finished with a 'Hitler piss', in order to regain much needed energy expent on the whole process.
"That was fun and to round off the day, I am off to steal a charity collection box and then desecrate a place of worship.” - Smokey, The Selhurst Arms, 26/02/02 |
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| matt_himself Matataland 03 Sep 16 9.53pm |
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Originally posted by kingdowieonthewall
This is actually a good thing when you're in your late 50's , matt. Fair point. As a tip, drink a bottle of White Burgundy followed by a few glasses of VSOP. For some reason I always wake up with a boner and need a piss after drinking that.
"That was fun and to round off the day, I am off to steal a charity collection box and then desecrate a place of worship.” - Smokey, The Selhurst Arms, 26/02/02 |
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| Part Time James 03 Sep 16 9.55pm |
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Originally posted by matt_himself
The method I use is something I have labelled the 'Red Adair'. You start with a stronger stream, bent forwards and aiming the old chap towards the porcelain. As the strength of the flow diminishes and the old chap becomes more flaccid, then a standing situation can be assumed, finished with a 'Hitler piss', in order to regain much needed energy expent on the whole process. Sounds like an adaptation of the superman. Efficient, I like that. I accidentally pissed all over our Argos catalogue once and only realised in the morning when I picked it up for a browse.
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Jimenez  SELHURSTPARKCHESTER,DA BRONX 03 Sep 16 10.09pm |
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Originally posted by Part Time James
Sounds like an adaptation of the superman. Efficient, I like that. I accidentally pissed all over our Argos catalogue once and only realised in the morning when I picked it up for a browse. These two methods are only really any good if peeing indoors though lads. The Niagra Falls method is far superior. Imagine your on holiday you wake up with said boner? What do you do? Well you open the patio doors to your 8th floor apartment and with p**** at full staff let it rip over the balcony.
Pro USA & Israel |
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palace777  belfast 03 Sep 16 10.32pm |
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Any c#nt who calls me "buddy"
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| braunstoneagle the middle of bumf*** nowhere... 03 Sep 16 10.39pm |
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people on the a5 who cant drive/overtake properly...everyday the general clientel in tesco on the rare ocassion i go there hypocritical people who dont practice what they preach when it comes to religion how we get ripped of for petrol how jack wilshere went to fricking bourmouth over palace
‘Football isn’t instant coffee. You have to work at it. You must grow the bean, grind it.’ Ian Holloway |
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| Inapickle South West 03 Sep 16 11.32pm |
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Originally posted by matt_himself
The method I use is something I have labelled the 'Red Adair'. You start with a stronger stream, bent forwards and aiming the old chap towards the porcelain. As the strength of the flow diminishes and the old chap becomes more flaccid, then a standing situation can be assumed, finished with a 'Hitler piss', in order to regain much needed energy expent on the whole process. ..just aim for the bath.
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| nhp61 Goring-By-Sea born, now in Brackne... 04 Sep 16 12.58pm |
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People who claim the Referendum Leave campaigners were just a bunch of liars. Of course, the Remain campaign was as pure as virgin snow and didn't utter one untruth at all...
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