Standards around this place are slipping. I can't believe the thread has gone this far without a single "To advise you properly we're going to need a picture" post.

We were somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the drugs began to take hold...

You probably need a few lessons in life rather than HR advice.

Anything you send to work colleague even if its on private phones can come back later and bite you on the nuts.

Expectbthis to have gone round the office by next week and for you to be the subject of 'office banter,' until some other poor idiot slips up.

Trust you never get managrd by the said vision of wonder your heart longs for.

Oh and expect this to ve resurrected periodically at social events for as longcas folks remember it!

Oops, must read the exam question. Not an issue if on your private texts, she shouldn't have been reading them.

Turn up at her office on Tuesday trouser less with your old boy hanging out and a greased up sex toy in your hand. Use the phrase "well are you f***ing up for it then or what ? "
y'know call her bluff in a reverse way.

Having written that I once worked in a leading supermarket chain and in the second week drew a very rude picture of the female manager on the toilet wall including her name. Word went round and rumour was everyone's handwriting was being checked. I would have outrun Carl Lewis to the bogs with my marker pen. Got away with it tho.

Say that you are gay and that 'boss' is gay slang for jacksy and that you fancy your mate.

'Lies to the masses as are like fly's to mollasses...they want more and more and more'

Is she fit, and would you?